Four Hundred and Twelve
by Summer Eventide
Summary: You are...well, you, and you are alone. You are driven by a goal. And most importantly, you are alone. Happy birthday, Barbie!


**I can't believe this. I write fanfic for the first time in a year, and it's about Homestuck. Home. Stuck.**

**Well, I guess I should explain.**

**I greatly dislike Homestuck, and nothing will probably change that. I don't like its slow start, I don't like its convoluted, almost nonsensical plot, I don't like the fact that some fans treat it like its the greatest thing on earth and that Andrew Hussie is some kind of god.**

**However...**

**As I've found out by writing this story (and the MSPA Wiki, what a lifesaver), this world that Andrew Hussie has created is vast, with a lot of potential. Its a veritable _goldmine _of stories, whether about the characters or the world (JohnDave forever, yo). And the not crazy side of the fanbase certainly rises to the challenge, whether through art or fanfics or music or animations or voice acting or cosplay..._wow_.**

**So, I say, if you really love Homestuck, you're awesome. Especially you, Barbie, considering I wrote this meant-to-be-like-2,000-word-but-managed-nearly-8,5 ****00-words-story for you. Happy birthday, and thanks for the opportunity to write this! ^^**

**(Also, I do not own the few lyrics scattered throughout this story; that would be Panic! At the Disco.)**

* * *

Space.

An ever expanding thing- no, not a thing, you think, as you sit on some random asteroid. A place, an _idea_, never contained; continually growing bigger and bigger until it encompassed the entire world. Then you realize that the world is so _much larger_ than that, and it envelops the next world, and the next world, and the next world, and the next-

Maybe that's why, you muse, still all alone on what you're sure is the satellite equivalent of Bumfuck Nowhere, Virginia, wearing the clothes of your dream self, there was no place (or should you dare to say _space_?) for your friends.

Friends.

(God, where did they go? What happened to them? Whydidtheyleaveyoubehind? ohgodyourealoneohgodohgodoh_god-)_

You slap yourself twice hard; there was no time for thinking about that anymore (this is almost as stupid as the time you heard of Long Ago, about another guy who played the game that had the urge to shit on his desk).

And besides, you think as you turn your back to the expanse, you know exactly why.

(Doesn't make it any less lonely.)

You are inclined to agree.

* * *

You remember when your dreams were not full of croaks.

(Barely.)

They certainly are now, however, and you hear them and see them everywhere. Frogs, in all the colors of the rainbow, surround you as you go up the same path you do every night, and see the same thing you see, too, before you wake up to another day of reaching a goal that seemed impossible.

("_Nothing's impossible! Don't be such a pessimist!", a boy with bright red hair calls to you, until that moment busy making mini-cyclones, only to snuff them out. "I mean, what we're doing is kind of impossible right now...")_

You remember that once of your friends (which one was it?) once told you that cheesy saying, _nothing is impossible_, but right now you don't believe it.

(You can't believe that you actually believed it then. Maybe you were giving the guy from Long Ago too little credit.)

You are suddenly snapped out of your thoughts, though, as the croaking stopped. You had reached _it_- your apparent goal as a Hero of Space.

A new universe, contained in a fucking frog. A _frog._

The Genesis Frog, standing proudly on a pedestal, far, far out of your current reach.

(He _is _considered a god.)

Long ago (very different from Long Ago), you would have admired its dark red skin, dappled with stars, planets, solar systems even more colorful than the regular, annoying frogs that you were glad to leave behind. You would have admired its large black eyes, twinkling with the promise of new life (no _matter how fucked up it would be)._

Long ago.

Right now, however, you wonder how you ever found it beautiful_,_ after all that trying to make it did to you and your friends. You didn't sign up for Professional Pokemon Breeding 2: Electric Boogaloo.

But you suddenly feel a _push_ (just like every night), and you start to feel...something. A base desire, starting small but quickly expanding in your chest. You _want _it, you think, you want to make it no matter the cost-

(Isn't that what you always wanted- to have power, to make something meaningful with your life? Didn't you _want _to _challenge _yourself?)

You desperately start to climb the pedestal (when did it grow stairs?), but the more you climb the farther away that stupid frog gets, never moving and choosing to stare instead. You're starting to get tired, but you keep running, and when you stumble and fall, you just pick yourself up, never minding the pain that's blossoming like roses over several of your body parts. You're close, so _close..._

And morning comes.

Without speaking, you get up, trying to hide your tiredness to an imaginary audience.

(And the bruises that litter your body like tiny stars and galaxies).

* * *

You remember your friends, sometimes, when you're not tired from looking at the genetic codes of countless frogs.

(You remember your friends almost all the time, when you're walking from place to place, when you're trying to plan how close you are to making that damn universe, when you're trying to sleep, even when you're thinking about that sword gathering dust _somewhere_-)

-You remember your friends. End of story.

(And you'll keep remembering them.)

Before they all went away (left you behind), you recall, you made up a quartet, just like everyone who's played the game before.

(_"Well, not everyone." A rather heavy-set girl says, long strawberry blonde hair kept neat and out of the way in twin braids. "Longer Ago, apparently there was a session which had twelve. But that's probably just a myth- I mean, we can barely handle this game right now, and we're only four players! Who could survive that type of madness?")_

Like everyone before, and like everyone after.

(Utterly, utterly normal. And you loathe normal, don't you?)

* * *

You look at your diagram written on the ground; a few hundred letters or two, forming short notes next to crude drawings of the amphibians, hastily scribbled with a stick. You've searched far and wide for the frogs you seek, for who knows how long.

What day is it, anyway?

...You can't recall.

You shake away these troubling thoughts, instead focusing closely on the diagram.

If this is true, you think, tentatively reaching for the abandoned stick once again, then that means, grasping your hand around the stick, that means.

You suddenly start writing, drawing, with a kind of frenzy in your eyes. Though, with the exception of your hand, you haven't moved an inch, you feel adrenaline rushing through you.

You've never experienced this, but this is amazing.

_("Uh, are you sure this is a good idea?", a boy with flat black hair says nervously, looking at the watch strapped to his right wrist. "...Yeah, I know that you're feeling an Idea, but couldn't you ask them to come instead? ...Wait, _he _told you that he had to fix the cloud layer, and _she _told you that she was going along for support and medic duties? And _you _actually _believed _them? You know full well that his powers are to destroy, and we'll need her freaky life powers more than him!")_

You drop the stick immediately after, letting it roll somewhere else, forgotten. You gaze down at the thing you just scribbled, a feeling starting to grow inside you, so strong that you don't even pay attention to the sudden breath of air that tugs at your clothes and your hair.

Snapping back into focus, you look down at what you wrote again, to make sure it's not a daydream. _Three frogs left_, it reads. _Three frogs left_.

You suddenly feel like sobbing.

The feeling in your chest grows larger. Though your chest suddenly feels tight, it's not a bad feeling.

What is this feeling, anyway? Relief?

(Hope.)

Shrugging, you leave, deep in thought on where those last frogs could be. As you have an inkling on where they could be, you push that question to the back of your mind.

Not like it means anything, anyway.

* * *

After a long, long travel through the Medium (you feel that if your Time player was still here, it would have seemed much faster), you land on your first location, the Land of Fog and Haze. You wonder how it even survived without someone living on it.

You wonder how it even survived without your friend.

You can hardly see in front of you as you slowly make your way through the land, even with the green glowing lamp you thought to bring; the fog had grown even thicker since the last time you'd been here (and how long ago was that? Three months or three years?).

That's understandable, since he had failed in his quest.

Through the haze (and after stumbling a few times on rocks or roots), you make out a tree. Long dead due to lack of sunlight (that was just above the thick, oppressive cloud layer, bright and warm, you saw, and why didn't you do _something_?), a few dried up leaves still hung pitifully to brittle twigs, the rest dead and slowly rotting around its base. Once you reach it (commendably not even stumbling once), you put your hand on the bark, right on the bark, and you know that this was the same tree.

Fall comes early and summer leaves, you mutter.

(_A red headed boy pushes up his glasses, peering up at the small patch of sunlight though the hole that he made in the clouds. "As a storm with the car keys!" he sings, very much intended to annoy as he leans back on the trunk of the tree. You call him an idiot, and the two others with you agree, the girl also adding that he should stop procrastinating._

_"You mean those things?" the boy replies, pointing up first at the clouds, hanging ominously above, and the haze, surrounding the quartet and the tree. "I'll get to it." the girl retorts that that's what procrastination _is_, and that album kind of sucked, anyway, and the boy just laughs at her, sending a gust of wind at her and messing up her braids.)_

You blink, squinting your eyes to see to the top of the tree. That's where he sat, you think, enjoying the fruit of his mild labor. You turn away (you seem to be doing that a lot lately), knowing suddenly where the frog would be. Though you previously thought you were beyond that, you fail to stifle a loud groan.

Time to do even more walking.

* * *

After climbing up the rough-hewn stairs that circled the tall pillar of rock (you are suddenly glad that you pestered your friend to have it installed, even if it resulted in him ignoring you for four days), you reach the very top. As in the style of things, the only object here (and the only object you care about at the moment), is his quest bed, vibrant blue with four short legs.

That's where he died.

(At least, if he had had more time.)

You sit down near the stairs, resting. Your legs hurt like hell, and you feel that with one more step you are going to collapse (considering where you are, that didn't seem advisable). So you rest, and you think.

It had been a regular day (or at least, how regular it _can _get when you play the game). He had gone out, finally deciding to do some work on his quest.

(_"Stop nagging me, will you?" he says in response to all of your pushing and prodding and scolding. "I'll go, alright? And no, you can't come with me- any of you." he says before any of them can open their mouths. Nodding, he turns away._

_"Besides," he says, voice starting to shake, "I need to- _can _do this on my own.")_

And (to indulge in cliché) he never came back.

(You always knew that the monsters he fought were particularly tough.)

You, for the most part, wasn't worried at all, but the other two were.

(_"Where could he be?" she says, her braids whipping back and forth._ "_I bet that idiot decided to procrastinate somewhere again!" Though the black-haired boy also seems worried, he keeps unusually silent. The girl looks to you, hoping for something, but you can do nothing but shrug._

_It's been only two days, you say to her. Remember the time he was gone for a week? He'll be fine. Right, Timelord?, you say, trying to drag him into your conversation._

_Yeah, sure, he says, brow furrowed as he walks away without warning.)_

As always, you were wrong.

Two days turned into a week, a week turned into two weeks, and _those_ two weeks turned into a month. Understandably, your friends were worried, but not you.

You're cool like that.

(_"Hey, hey!" the boy with black hair said, stopping the panicking that you and the girl were about to do. How rude. "How about we look for him?" he suggests gently. "I mean, even if he did...die, and his dream self on Prospit is, uh...kind of dead, too, we just pop him on his quest bed and he'll ascend, won't he?")_

Yup, you're absolutely, totally perfect under pressure.

But suggestions are always nice.

So you three followed his advice and started to search. It took forever , but you finally find him.

(Technically, you find his body, but it doesn't matter either way.)

You took his body to his quest bed, laying it down perfectly on the smooth blue rock. Then, you waited.

And waited.

And waited.

_(Trembling, the girl touches his hand with hers. "He's definitely dead." she says. "So...why isn't he...?" The other boy comes up and tentatively touches her shoulder._

_I think that we waited far too long to look for him, he whispers. I knew that there was a time limit of sorts when it comes to ascending to godhood, but... He is interrupted by the girl shoving his hand off of her._

_"So...he's permanently dead?" she says to him. Without waiting for a reply, she turns back to the body, takes it in her arms, and throws it off the pillar. You try to say something as you and the boy rush to the edge of the pillar, but you can't find any words._

_"He's free, now." the girl says dully, braids unraveled. She points to the body of their friend, still falling, and you squint through the haze to watch as he stops just before he hits the ground. The wind carries him up then, allowing one more clear look at him before flying him away from them into the heavy fog below on a breath of air that gently ruffles your clothes._

_"He wouldn't have wanted to be stuck in the ground, so I guess it's a good thing that his aspect was Breath." your friend whispers before turning and starting to climb down, leaving you and the boy alone, wondering whether to laugh or cry.)_

(That's enough.)

You get up from your comfortable place, stretching your arms and legs and walking towards the abandoned quest bed. It won't bring him back if you remember, you think. You have a job to do.

But considering the circumstances, you muse, gently picking up a frog whose vibrant red shade reminds you of his hair, you aren't that surprised anymore about what happened to _her_ after.

The frog croaks once as you begin the journey down.

* * *

As you try to fall asleep (you need as much rest as possible if you're going to walk again like you did in the Land of Fog and Haze), you think about the very first time you had heard of the game.

Back when you were in school (back when you _had _time for school, back before your world was absolutely destroyed by _you_), you were an alright student, pulling mostly B's and C's with a constant D in Math. Your favorite class, however, the one you consistently got A's in, was Ancient History. Specifically, ancient religions.

You were fascinated by different people's beliefs- whether because you weren't sure of your own or because you merely liked to see a different facet of people's cultures-

(Or maybe you wanted to experience that type of power, that kind of recognition godhood would give you, maybe you wanted to _challenge_ yourself)

-you would never know. You learned about the usual ancient belief systems long dead and gone- the Egyptians, the Greeks, the Romans- as well as the newer religions that had joined history. But what drew you in the most was the ancient religion whose name had been lost to time, but was the basis, they said, of most of the current religions and superstitions on your planet- the Four.

Two gods and two goddesses, your teacher had said, writing notes on the blackboard. They used to have names, your teacher had continued, but they have been lost to time, and even back then only a few select followers in every sect knew their true names. Instead, he said, people referred to them by their titles. With that, your teacher had rummaged through his bag, holding four cards, blank on the side you could see. He flipped the first card, showing you and your classmates the beautifully illustrated drawing on that side.

The Heir of Breath, he had proclaimed, gesturing to the picture of a boy (at least, he looked like a boy) in blue clothes complete with hood, shielding his face but allowing a few tendrils of dark hair to be seen. Air currents formed around him, seemingly enveloping him in a tight embrace. And...was that an overbite?

Before you could be sure, your teacher put down the card, picking up another one, this one depicting a beautiful girl with light colored hair, hood also worn to expose nothing but a few strands of hair and lips curled into a slight smile. Her clothes were the color yellow, and she held what looked to be a black sphere in her hand. The Seer of Light, you teacher said, before picking up the third picture.

Unlike the first two pictures, which were full frontal views, the god in the third picture leaned on one side of the picture, his clothes vibrant red. Also unlike the first two, his hood was down, exposing in profile his hair that was slightly brighter that the girl's. His eyes, however, were hidden, strangely, by shades (perhaps it was a stylistic choice by the artist?, you remember thinking), his hand holding tight to the hilt of his sword.

The Knight of Time, your teacher said, before picking up the last card. This card showed a girl in green, her hood also down. Her wild, messy black hair (with added cowlick, you noted) curled around her face and cascaded down her back. The eyes behind her glasses twinkled like her slight buck teeth, and a pair of furry dog ears were on her head. She held nothing in her hand like the first picture, but instead of air currents there were frogs around her instead.

She looked beautiful, you think. She looked powerful. But most of all, she looked _important._

(Was that the start of your slippery slope?)

And finally, he said, the Witch of Space. He put the cards back down and turned to the board once more. This goddess, he said as he wrote on the board, was one of the most important, the most worshipped. Apparently, she was responsible for creating the universe we live in today, in the form of a mysterious being known as a Genesis Frog.

But what is most interesting about this belief system, however..., he began, only to get cut off by the bell. People started to file out of the room, looking for their next class.

Everyone except you, obviously. You have a job to do, and curiosity to sate.

Not like anyone cared, anyway, for the person who was so utterly _normal_ they probably thought your favorite color was beige.

(And that's why you read the book and wanted to play the game, right? You wanted to be _special_, to actually do something worthwhile. You _wanted_ a challenge.)

So you stayed behind, clearing your throat to get your teacher's attention. He turned to you, nodding when he sees who it is, and asked if you have a question.

Yes I do, you said. Nothing much, really. I just want to know- is there anything I can...uh, read to understand the topic better? I don't really get it.

Your teacher narrowed his eyes in suspicion. He knew you usually never needed to ask for supplementary materials, but you hoped that his trust in you would work to your advantage. An intense moment passed between you and your teacher before he gave up, sighing.

Of course, he said. Before he reached into his bag, however, he looked around, as if someone might be watching him. When he finished playing suspicious ninja, he retrieved a bright green book. He then handed it to you.

What was interesting about this belief system, however, he said to you, continuing his lecture, is that apparently, before they became gods, they were regular thirteen year olds. He looked around the room again before continuing. They were, at least. Then...they played Sburb. Of course, he added, it's called something different now.

Before you could ask What the hell is Sburb, the bell cut you off again. Your teacher shoved the book in your hands.

I can't say anymore, he said. I've already told you things I'm not supposed to until you've turned thirteen. The book will probably answer all your questions, if you can understand it. You probably won't, though, he said off-handedly, before he directed you to the door and shut it. You looked down at the book in your hands. It had no author, no design. In fact, there was only one word there.

The title of the book.

_Homestuck_.

You snap back to the present, yawning. It seems like the tactic of 'remember everything that happened before you killed everyone' always works in putting you to sleep. You quickly drop into a deep slumber, dreaming once again about frogs.

(But you wonder...if you knew what _really _happened in the game, would you still have taken that book?)

...

(yes)

* * *

Your back aches. Did you have to fall down the stairs in that stupid fucking dream?

(Will you ever not?)

Well, you don't have time to think about that, as you are currently catching your breath from travelling through the medium for the second time (once again, you wish for your Time player). Two frogs left, you think. Two frogs left. Breath successfully caught, you turn to face the lonely landscape of the Land of Vines and Dust.

However, you think to yourself as you walk through the cool but dense forests of vines that make up the planet, it is not lonely in the sense of the first planet you'd been to. That planet was-

You are suddenly shaken from your thoughts as you nearly trip on a vine you were sure wasn't growing out of the ground before (perhaps you should cut back on your pastime of talking to yourself). You watch in silence as it grows much faster than any plant has the right to, snaking its way past the other existing vines and trees to touch the sky. Satisfied, you nod and move on.

Yup, much different from the Land of Fog and Haze, you continue in your mind, now while keeping an eye out for more vines and trees. After all, she had finished her quest- faster than anyone, actually. In fact, she was the first of your friends to go God Tier.

She didn't really like her power at first, though. Good thing she got over it quickly enough.

(_"What the hell did you just do?" the red headed boy asks, shocked. The girl just starts to sob, blabbering about how she wanted to fix that stupid skimmed knee of his and then she was suddenly standing in a patch of shriveled up plant matter and why was he so stupid, anyway, climbing up on one of the vines and creating a dust-devil when the place has Dust as its second word, goddamnit!_

_"Uh, you should calm down, methinks." the red headed boy replies, cleaning his dirty glasses using the hem of his shirt. "It's probably your weird, freaky...uh, life powers." _

_Freaky life powers?, you snort, standing with the black haired boy a safe distance away, and he rolls his eyes. You know how they are, he says, and you two just watch as the other half of your quartet do an odd dance of screaming and comforting.)_

Alright, so it took a few more nondescript units of time-

(Actually, it took about seventeen days and five hours)

-for her to adjust to her life-stealing powers, but, you suppose, her quest turned out alright in the end, and the fact that you've planted your face squarely on about eight fast growing vines by now (you note that ahead of you the growing vines are increasing in volume; that means you're close) is definitely proof of that. So no, not the same type of lonely as the first land.

No, you think, the reason this place is lonely is because she isn't here.

You're certainly here, though, if here means your destination. You stop in front of a tree that towered above even the later trees and vines you saw. In fact, it is almost the antithesis of the tree you came across in the first land; though your friend was long gone, the tree was still growing strong, and the vines curling around its trunk also seemed to be thriving. You approach the tree, going around it until you reach the very back. You quickly find the trapdoor, kicking away the dead leaves meant to conceal it before opening it. You were expecting it, but until now you are still jarred by the drop into the darkness that getting to her quest bed entails.

Here goes nothing, you think, before jumping into the darkness.

* * *

You fall.

You fall.

You fall.

You fall.

Light, slowly getting closer.

You f-

You are cut off from your musings of your current situation due to hitting the ground with a considerable thump. After shortly rolling on the ground in pain (this, you recall with some difficulty, was her idea of a practical joke), you slowly get up, your body still throbbing slightly as you look around the room.

More like a den than a room, actually, you note, as you survey your surroundings. The place, though underground, was well-lit by the bright white lanterns stuck to the walls, allowing you to see every nook and cranny of the area, even up to the vaulted ceiling, a combination of tightly packed dirt and tree roots. As with most quest bed locations, the den, though spacious, was mostly empty, save for the rock bed at the far end of the room, white with the green symbol of Life emblazoned on it.

Unlike the visit to the first land, your legs do not, in fact, hurt like hell, so you waste no time taking the first step across the room. This time, there is no danger whatsoever. Yup, none at all. In fact, you feel so confident in your abilities to not attract danger that you start to smile. And there is none.

(On the first step, at least.)

The second step, however, is a different story, and before you can even think about it a tall brown _thing_ comes up, so sharply that you can almost hear the cheap stock effect. It grows taller, taller, and taller, before stopping at the ceiling. Recognizing the thing that tried to impale you, you curse and step back.

You forgot; when you and your friend killed her, you didn't disengage all of the vines that she put out to stop you.

Damn, you really should stop being lazy.

You prepare yourself the best you can for this unexpected gameplay change, hoping that the first time you hacked your way through here you were clumsy enough to trip on most of them. No such luck, however, for as soon as you take a few steps more another oddly sharp vine shoots out of the ground. You quickly throw yourself to the side, dodging yet another one of the things.

Why did she even put these things out?, you grumble you yourself inwardly, slowly but surely making progress through the cave. Oh yeah, she went absolutely fucking insane.

Wow, you are tripping over these vines like crazy. You must be less clumsy that you think.

Now, where were you? Oh yes, your friend going psycho.

Honestly, you and your friend weren't surprised at all that she went bonkers, not after your first friend died. She kept to herself after that incident, barely going out of her land or even her den. You suspected that she holed up in there so she could control her dream self on Prospit and look for him (even if all three of you knew he was long gone), but you dismissed it as harmless.

You'd think that you would have known that you were always wrong.

(_"Come on!" the boy snapped, running his fingers through his hair in a rare show of frustration. "I don't care whether or not you think that my beliefs are unfounded, but I _do _care about _her_!" Without looking at you, he opens the trapdoor and unceremoniously pushes you into the darkness, following soon after.)_

And after that mild betrayal, you fell.

And fell.

And fell.

And f-

You are forced to stop your mental tirade as several vines surround you at once. You manage you slip between two of them right before another one, larger than the rest, grows right where you would have been. Panting, you wipe some sweat from your brow and continue moving. You're half-way, now...

_("Are you alright?" the boy shouts, still ignoring you, even after you landed on him rolling on pain. How rude. "Hello? Is anybody here?" No reply. Your small party of two step into the light as you spy your friend lying on her quest bed, her long strawberry blonde hair uncharacteristically unbraided, allowing it to form a halo around her head._

_"Hey!", your partner says with relief as he takes a step forward. You hang back, tentatively following him as well. You're expecting the worst as you slowly raise your foot in the act of moving forward towards your strangely quiet friend. You slowly set your foot down._

_Nothing happens._

_You finally let a similar smile of relief take over your face, and you also ask your friend if there was anything wrong. Without waiting for a reply, you take a second step. Nothing could go wrong now._

_Of course, it did._

_"What the-", the black haired boy says, jumping back from the giant vine that shot out of the ground in front of him. "What...what are you doing?", he shouts at her, but as soon as the words leave his mouth his eyes grow wide with realization. "Oh God, oh God, oh God...", he whispers. "It's happening already? So that's why you dreamed...and found out."_

_You start to wonder what the hell he's talking about, but two vines suddenly grow on either side of you. They luckily don't hit you, but it's unnerving nonetheless. You see your friend get up from the bed, tears running down her cheeks and catching the light._

_Of course you would know, Seer, she says in a whisper that you can somehow hear all the way across the room. You would know, and you would _lie_. You don't even know what the hell is going on, but you see your friend pale._

_"No...no! I didn't know at first- only brief flashes..." he mumbles, taking a tentative step forward. "But...y-yeah, I know." The girl smiles at him fondly._

_I knew that you'd figure some like this out, she says before her voice turns cold. But...I can't die again. I _won't_ die again. So if you're to kill me, she says, before you or your friend could object about your actual motives, I will kill you guys first. Sorry._

_You and the boy look at each other silently for an eternity before you draw your sword.) _

The vines start to thin as you move closer and closer; a relief, since you feel like you could collapse. You slowly make your way to the quest bed, sitting down and tiredly reaching for the gray frog that had watched you silently ever since you had entered this room.

It wasn't this hard the last time, you think, gazing down at your black clothes, sweaty and dirty, in some places even torn to expose your skin and some scratches. On the other hand, you had a friend there to help.

You remember the system you fell into as you crossed the room; you lead on point, hacking away with your sword or occasionally shrinking the vines you couldn't reach with it (back then, you were, sadly, only in the middle part of your echeladder), while your friend followed behind and warned you about incoming doom. As you got closer and closer, you saw your other friend's (or was she an enemy now?) face start to twist into worry, then outright _rage_ as you seemed to trip over every vine that was in ten feet of her and still manage to live. The vines slowed to a stop as you reached the side of her bed, and you absentmindedly wondered if the vines would remain dotted everywhere.

(Apparently not, you think, as the vines triggered this time already start to sink back into the ground.)

Once you caught your breaths, the two of you stared at her, and she stared back. For a long, long, minute you did this, and you began to relax, letting your sword hang loosely from your hand.

Then she stabbed you.

(_You look down at the dagger in your shoulder with disbelief, not really feeling the pain, then back at the girl, breathing heavily. Suddenly, she starts laughing (and you suddenly feel light headed)._

_"Listen up", she begins harshly, "I will not die again. Dying... fucking sucks. It really does. It hurts, nothing's on the other side for us. And..." she closes her eyes, and you suddenly start to feel weak. You and your friend realize what's happening at the same time, but you can do nothing, and he does nothing but stare at empty air as you feel the life literally flow out of you coupled with blood loss._

_Your friend turns towards her, subconsciously running his hands through his hair, and he gives her a look. Though no words broke the heavy silence, you could almost hear him shouting that she broke her promise, that she betrayed her friends, but she apathetically shrugs._

_"Oh, well. As someone once said, if you're going then go", she says suddenly, unnervingly cheerful. She nods at you once, and you feel your sword sliding out of your already weak grasp as you hit the floor, landing near your friend's feet. You suddenly feel so tired; mind clouding and senses dulling. A nap would be great..._

_You don't know how long you lay there, but you're shaken out of your stupor by a clear, crisp popping noise, followed by a sudden wave of energy that courses throughout your body. Following this wave of energy are all the other sounds that were around you; namely, the clang of metal on metal (you'd forgotten she had a _pair_ of knives), screams, and finally, the unmistakable sound of a weapon driving through flesh, accompanied by a short scream of pain._

_You probably weren't completely shaken out of your stupor, because when the thought finally crosses your mind to prop yourself up and stare at the sight of your black-haired friend holding your sword, now bloody, as well as the twitching body of the girl on her bed, looking down in disbelief at the blood coming out of her chest and staining her tight-fit clothes, all you do is stare like an idiot._

_"W-W-What?", she blubbers, reaching down her shirt and feeling the fatal wound, her hand coming back with blood. She looks up, first at you, then at your friend, still grasping tightly to your sword, who is meeting her gaze with resolve. "What?", she says again, a little more clearly, and her eyes widen as the magnitude of her situation kicks in._

_"No! NO!" she screams, pulling at her long strawberry blonde hair. You step back, wanting to get away from the raving girl, but your friend doesn't follow; instead, he stays where he is, calmly watching as if his former friend wasn't crying while blood oozed out of a wound he caused._

_"I WON'T DIE AGAIN! I won't die again! I won't! I won't...I...How could you do this to me?" is what she screams before she degenerates into helpless sobbing, collapsing back on the bed, not even minding the broken dagger next to her. Though she doesn't look at either of you, a child could understand who _you _was._

_Meanwhile, your friend finally opens his mouth to say something, but his voice is hard, something that almost seems...unnatural, coming from him. I did what I had to do, he explains, making no move to go closer to the dying girl. I can't allow you to kill us, not when I don't know what part we are yet to play._

_"Part to play?", the girl repeats in a much softer voice than three minutes ago. "It doesn't matter what part we're going to play. In the end, we're _always _going to fail." She trails off, another cryptic reference to something you don't even have the slightest inkling about. "I...I want my mom...", she chokes through a sob. "I want my mom."_

_Well, she's not going to appear, because we killed her, your friend says coldly (and you think you can detect some bitterness as well). And your dad, and our parents as well, and the entire world. We sacrificed so much for this...this _game_, he spits out, looking at you for a moment before turning away, So if this is what we have to do, if this is _all_ we can do, I'm willing to do it. Goodbye._

_And with that, he finally loosens his grasp on the sword, letting it fall. You better get that, he calls over his shoulder as he walks away, and you hasten to follow him, picking up the sword (you really need to clean it, you think) and putting it in its scabbard, tuning away from the body. You don't look back when you hear the familiar sound of curling vines growing and sinking back into the ground with cargo. You don't even look back when, while you're picking your way through the shriveled up vines that litter the floor, you can almost hear a clock tick once, twice, then stop, followed by the whisper of a single word you can't make out. _

_Instead, you plant your gaze firmly forward, watching your last friend disappearing into the exit that lead to the world above, and you think about finding some answers.)_

You suddenly find yourself at the entrance to the very same exit, and you wonder how the hell you even got here with the white frog in your hands (on the other hand, it was a very long flashback). Strangely enough, though time has passed since then, you still find yourself with the same questions.

However, you muse thoughtfully as you climb up the winding stairs, you have a feeling they would be answered very soon.

* * *

You cross your fingers as you encounter yet another steel door in the middle of nowhere. Hoping that your luck would finally help you for once, you open it, but as soon as you see a familiar sepia-toned glow settle over the still blurry contents, you shut the door tightly behind you.

Another memory, you think with slight disgust as you move on, the perfectly smooth steel surface under your feet making a slight sound where you step. I don't want to see any of his memories. You glance at the cloudless, pale gray sky, wondering how anyone without a watch was supposed to tell the time here. The Land of Steel and Doors, you find, lives up to its name, as you open several more doors without any luck. Finally, on what you think might be the twenty-ninth door you've opened since you got here, you enter the room, made of the same shiny steel as everything else, his bright red bed a stark contrast. You look around, remembering the last time you were in this room (you seem to be recalling a lot of things lately).

_(You enter the room, breathing heavily from nervousness. There's nothing wrong with asking a friend a few questions, you tell yourself sternly, eyes closed. Sure, he'd been acting rather strange ever since the girl had died, but since you weren't trying to kill him, you felt more or less safe._

_You smile a little as you think about something to say to break the ice (God, how pathetic are you, so paranoid you can't even trust your friend?), but that's suddenly a thing of the past when you realize he's not there.) _

You snap out of your reverie, however, when you hear a long, low croak. You snap your head up, spotting movement. Indeed, the dark blue frog croaks once again, but as you run towards it, trying to coerce it into your arms, but it just hops away, the stubborn little bastard. Sighing, you resign yourself to chasing after it, stepping out of the room and back onto the dull landscape.

At least the thing will be easier to see, you mutter before you go after it, trying not to get annoyed by the monotonous sound of shoes hitting ground.

You run.

You run.

You run.

You run.

(You continue to run while an odd sense of déjà vu hits you. You wonder what it is this time...you certainly haven't run over a empty steel gray planet made of literal steel searching for a techicolored frog before. You also are suddenly wondering how a tiny blue frog can outrun you. These questions detract from your main purpose of _running_, however, so you push the frankly unnerving questions to the very back of your head, and)

You r-

You halt to a grinding stop at the frog stops evading you right at the edge of the planet (back when there were four of them, you were almost killed more than once by the sheer drops that littered the land. When you and the others asked what the hell that was about, though, your friend just shrugged and muttered something about time and doors). You, being the rather savvy person you are, and after the other two things, start to suspect that you were brought here for a reason. You stare at the frog, hoping for a clue, but it blinks innocently back.

And then, you realize.

(It took you this long to figure it out? Some hero you are.)

This is...

(_You pant, bending over to try and catch your breath. Even if you alternated between a brisk walk and a leisurely jog, you still managed the need to gasp for air like a dying man at the end of it. You call his name again when you recover, and this time he replies._

_"I'm over here", he says, just a faint figure on the horizon, with his regular tone of voice and not the absolutely frigid one he used back when your group was three. Your spirits raise once again, and the smile goes back on your face as you go back to a leisurely jog. You notice as you get closer that his back is turned to you, looking at something in his hand._

_"Whoa, be careful!" he exclaims as you skid to a stop next to him, looking up at you. He nods a little away from both of your feet; another one of his planet's sheer drops. "You were lucky the first time that he was there to help", he warns. "Now that it's going to be just you, you should be more conscious about things like this."_

_You roll your eyes at his statement, and it's so much like old times that you can almost see them- the girl with braids agreeing with him, the red-headed boy floating on air a few centimeters from the ground and arguing about how they aren't children anymore. _

_Then, you blink once, twice. Did you hear..._just you_?_

_You look at him questioningly, but you see that he has resumed staring at the object in his hand; you realize that it is a magic eight ball. He shakes his head, lifting his head away from you as he begins to speak in an almost dreamy tone. "I know it's going to be hard, but she was right in the end...nothing we can do will change anything."_

_What are you talking about, you ask, touching his shoulder to try and get him to look at you, but he continues on like you're not even there. "Brief flashes at first, but over time I saw much more. Until..." he trails off. "I saw the entire picture, and I understood." He chooses this time to face you. "Hundreds of different timelines, you know. Different people, different places, but it always remained the same...they all failed, and we're going to fail too."_

_Silence._

_...You're not implying, you finally say after a silence that spanned an eternity, that this...that we did this..._

_"For nothing?", he finishes your sentence. "That we killed everyone we've ever known, and that our friends died for nothing? Yes. And," he continues, seeing you open your mouth to ask another question, "that I am leaving you as well? Yes."_

_Once more, silence._

_What do you mean, 'leave', you say angrily after an even lengthier pause than the last. If this timeline really is..._that_, then how will the world reset if you just _leave_?_

_"We're a repeat of a repeat of a repeat of a session." he answers. "Once the original session performs a Scratch, and the initial post-session also fails, even without a manual Scratch it will repeat itself, and will continue to repeat itself until it renews with more...favorable conditions. However, the session will only renew when either..." here he swallows. "When either everyone is dead, or something happens that permanently hinders progression, or someone tries to create the new universe, it will automatically activate it. You would have known this if you read the whole book.", he says wryly._

_That part was far too boring, you want to say, but you don't, so have even more silence. Your friend takes a step towards the edge._

_"...You know, I never thought it would end this way. I always thought that I'd live a normal life, meeting a person I loved, settling down, enjoying life, d-dying peacefully in my sleep." He turns his head towards the drop, not looking at you. "B-But look where I am n-now. It's futile to keep staying here, s-so..." He calls over his shoulder at you, his voice shaking even more. "W-Will you...will y-you join me?"_

_He holds a shaking hand behind him, and you take a tentative step forward, because yes, you want join him, because what kind of life is a life that's spent absolutely alone?_

_But then you think of your family, your teachers, your friends. Don't people always say to never give up? You think of glasses and red hair. You think of halos and braids._

_(You think that you're far too young to die.)_

_You know its futile, but you owe it to them to at least _try_._

_So you take a step back, and even if he can't possibly see you shake your head when you're behind him, he lets his hand fall and he takes a step forward, no longer shaking. _

_"Spark your heels up against the picket fence I built", he sings, he honest-to-god _sings_ as he takes another step. "All your wishes...they will sink like stones, slowly down a lonely way..."_

_He takes a step into thin air._

_You turn._

_You run._

_Coward, you keep thinking, but you don't know if it describes you or him.)_

You look at the frog, and it looks back.

You grab it, and you walk away.

There's something you have to put off.

* * *

You dream that night, and for once, it's not about frogs or bruises or (horror of horrors) running up stairs. Instead, you dream of pure darkness, merely sitting down (you think) until someone calls your name, and you for some reason answer. After that, you hear a padding of feet behind you, but it's so dark that you probably couldn't see it if it was right in front of you.

"So." the creature simply says, in a surprisingly clear voice that definitely denotes it as female, but a voice you still don't recognize. "You're really going to go through with this? He was right, you know."

You don't reply, and the creature keeps on talking in a rather perky voice. "On the other hand, I won't say that it's exactly stupid to do this. You've worked hard on this, and of course hope is a very powerful thing. Do I know! How long did we wait for that again?" She mutters to herself incomprehensibly, then sighs. "Nevermind."

Uh, you interject before she can say more, I have to ask why you're in my dreams?

"Oh?" she says. "Oh- sorry, it's not very often I enter dreams. Anyway." The creature coughs. "Anyway...if you're really going to do this...don't blame yourself. For anything."

"...What?" you manage to say, and it is odd how your voice sounds to your ears; almost as if you haven't heard it at all for a while. "How can you say that? I was the one who told them about the game! If I hadn't gotten that stupid book...if I hadn't-"

"Wanted to be special?" the creature finishes. "Look at it this way...it no longer matters. If you do what you want to do, no matter what happens this timeline will give way to the new. So...would you really want to end this way, self-pitying and full of guilt?" She puts her hand on your shoulder gently. "You're not just a Hero of Space, you know. You're a knight, too, and knights are supposed to be brave, aren't they?" She removes her hand off your shoulder then, gasping a little.

"It's almost time for you wake up!" the creature says a little too cheerfully. "Good...good luck." And with that, a flash of green, and the creature is gone.

* * *

You wake up, and you go to the Forge.

(You feel something in your chest.)

There is something you must do.

(Hope.)

And as the world crumbles around you, you manage a slight smile.


End file.
